TUESDAY|NNP ,|, AUGUST|NNP 03|CD ,|, 2004|CD Captured|NNP Moments|NNP Published|VBN in|IN Double|RB Feature|NNP by|IN Emma|NNP Bull|NNP and|CC Will|MD Shetterly|NNP (|( NESFA|NNP Press|NNP ,|, 1994|CD )|) .|. 
This|DT work|NN is|VBZ hereby|NN released|VBN into|IN the|DT Public|NNP Domain|NNP .|. 
To|TO view|VB a|DT copy|NN of|IN the|DT public|JJ domain|NN dedication|NN ,|, visit|NN http|NN :|: /|NN /|NN creativecommons|NNS .|. org|NN /|NN licenses|NNS /|NN publicdomain|NN /|NN or|CC send|VB a|DT letter|NN to|TO Creative|NNP Commons|NNP ,|, 559|CD Nathan|NNP Abbott|NNP Way|NNP ,|, Stanford|NNP ,|, California|NNP 94305|CD ,|, USA|NNP .|. 
Captured|NNP Moments|NNP by|IN Will|MD Shetterly|NNP I|PRP remember|VBP Papa|NN 's|POS stopbox|NN ,|, a|DT teal|NN blue|JJ Tiempo|NNP Capturado|NNP that|IN Mama|NNP brought|VBD home|NN for|IN his|PRP$ birthday|NN .|. 
It|PRP was|VBD huge|JJ and|CC inefficient|JJ ,|, and|CC she|PRP should|MD never|RB have|VB spent|VBN so|RB many|JJ pesos|NNS on|IN a|DT toy|NN ,|, but|CC Papa|NN would|MD not|RB let|VB her|PRP$ return|NN it|PRP .|. 
He|PRP used|VBD it|PRP to|TO preserve|VB baby|NN tomatoes|NNS ,|, cucumbers|NNS ,|, and|CC strawberries|NNS in|IN translucent|JJ cubes|NNS that|IN he|PRP stored|VBD in|IN the|DT pantry|NN for|IN spring|NN -|- time|NN meals|NNS in|IN the|DT middle|NN of|IN winter|NN .|. 
Mama|NNP kept|VBD her|PRP$ mink|NN jacket|NN ,|, a|DT family|NN hand|VB -|- me|PRP -|- down|RB ,|, safe|JJ from|IN time|NN in|IN a|DT stopbox|NN ,|, and|CC lent|VBD the|DT capturador|NN to|TO my|PRP$ uncle|NN for|IN his|PRP$ stamp|NN collection|NN .|. 
Sometimes|RB they|PRP would|MD let|VB us|PRP little|JJ ones|NNS to|TO seal|VB a|DT treasured|JJ toy|NN or|CC a|DT last|JJ piece|NN of|IN birthday|NN cake|NN until|IN we|PRP begged|VBN them|PRP for|IN its|PRP$ release|NN ,|, usually|RB a|DT few|JJ hours|NNS after|IN enclosing|VBG it|PRP .|. 

When|WRB my|PRP$ father|NN died|VBD ,|, a|DT year|NN after|IN my|PRP$ mother|NN ,|, my|PRP$ sisters|NNS and|CC I|PRP cleaned|VBD out|RP their|PRP$ apartment|NN .|. 
We|PRP found|VBD our|PRP$ baby|NN shoes|NNS protected|VBN in|IN stopboxes|NNS .|. 
I|PRP took|VBD mine|NN home|NN ,|, where|WRB they|PRP sat|VBD above|IN my|PRP$ computer|NN while|IN I|PRP worked|VBD on|IN my|PRP$ first|JJ play|NN .|. 
One|CD night|NN when|WRB I|PRP did|VBD not|RB believe|VB love|NN had|VBN ever|RB existed|VBN for|IN anyone|NN ,|, I|PRP used|VBD my|PRP$ own|JJ capturador|NN ,|, a|DT sleek|JJ titanium|NN Sanyo|NNP Tardar|NNP Ahora|NNP ,|, to|TO undo|VB the|DT stopbox|NN .|. 
Bringing|NNP my|PRP$ face|NN close|RB to|TO the|DT shoes|NNS ,|, I|PRP breathed|VBD deeply|RB of|IN air|NN that|IN my|PRP$ parents|NNS had|VBD trapped|VBN while|IN closing|NN up|RB that|DT symbol|NN of|IN their|PRP$ love|NN for|IN me|PRP .|. 

The|DT instant|JJ would|MD have|VB been|VBN improved|VBN had|VBN my|PRP$ baby|NN shoes|NNS been|VBN cleaned|VBN before|IN they|PRP were|VBD encased|JJ .|. 
But|CC as|RB soon|RB as|IN I|PRP coughed|VBD ,|, I|PRP laughed|VBD ,|, and|CC I|PRP did|VBD not|RB try|VB to|TO kill|VB myself|PRP that|DT night|NN .|. 

Let|VB me|PRP begin|VB again|RB .|. 

I|PRP like|VBP life|NN on|IN the|DT resort|NN worlds|NNS -|- -|- always|RB have|VBP and|CC ,|, after|IN the|DT upcoming|JJ mindwipe|NN ,|, always|RB will|MD .|. 
Last|JJ year|NN ,|, I|PRP rented|VBN a|DT small|JJ house|NN on|IN Vega|NNP IV|NNP ,|, a|DT sea|NN world|NN ,|, all|DT islands|NNS and|CC reefs|NNS and|CC archipelagos|NNS ,|, turquoise|NN waters|NNS and|CC aquamarine|NN skies|NNS ,|, sunrises|NNS like|IN symphonies|NNS and|CC sunsets|NNS like|IN stars|NNS gone|VBN supernova|NN .|. 
There|EX 's|VBZ only|RB one|CD city|NN :|: called|VBN Nuevo|NNP Acapulco|NNP in|IN La|NNP Enciclopedia|NNP del|FW Empirio|NNP de|IN la|FW Humanidad|NNP ,|, it|PRP 's|VBZ N|NNP '|POS apulco|NN to|TO the|DT locals|NNS .|. 
The|DT N|NNP '|POS apulcans|NNS are|VBP mostly|RB emigrants|NNS from|IN Polaris|NNP II|NNP ;|: the|DT only|JJ difference|NN between|IN them|PRP and|CC their|PRP$ Carribbean|NNP ancestors|NNS is|VBZ that|IN the|DT ancestors|NNS fleeced|VBN NorAm|NNP tourists|NNS .|. 
Now|RB the|DT N|NNP '|POS apulcans|NNS profit|VBP from|IN their|PRP$ Hispanic|JJ siblings|NNS .|. 

I|PRP do|VBP n't|RB mean|VB to|TO sound|VB cynical|JJ .|. 
I|PRP suppose|VBP I|PRP wish|VBP to|TO show|VB that|IN I|PRP 'm|VBP still|RB capable|JJ of|IN a|DT certain|JJ authorial|NN distance|NN ,|, a|DT semblance|NN of|IN dispassionate|NN observation|NN .|. 
The|DT following|VBG events|NNS may|MD indicate|VB otherwise|RB .|. 

In|IN fine|NN tourist|NN tradition|NN ,|, most|JJS homes|NNS on|IN Vega|NNP IV|NNP are|VBP named|VBN .|. 
Mine|NNP was|VBD The|DT Sleeping|NNP Flamingo|NNP ,|, and|CC its|PRP$ outer|JJ walls|NNS were|VBD coral|NN pink|JJ .|. 
Were|VBD they|PRP mood|NN -|- sensitive|JJ ,|, they|PRP would|MD have|VB changed|VBN as|IN I|PRP first|RB viewed|VBN them|PRP .|. 
The|DT rental|JJ agent|NN ,|, an|DT attractive|JJ N|NNP '|POS apulcan|NN named|VBD Tasha|NNP Cortez|NNP ,|, was|VBD not|RB mood|NN -|- sensitive|JJ either|RB .|. 
She|PRP said|VBD ,|, "|'' It|PRP 's|VBZ beautiful|JJ ,|, is|VBZ n't|RB it|PRP ,|, Señor|NNP Flynn|NNP ?|. "|'' 

My|PRP$ instinct|NN was|VBD to|TO gesture|NN curtly|RB with|IN a|DT cupped|JJ hand|NN that|IN she|PRP lift|VBP the|DT wind|NN boat|NN and|CC take|VB me|PRP elsewhere|RB .|. 
But|CC she|PRP was|VBD young|JJ and|CC attractive|JJ (|( as|IN I|PRP have|VBP said|VBN and|CC may|MD say|VB again|RB )|) and|CC eager|JJ and|CC so|RB happy|JJ to|TO be|VB assisting|VBG the|DT infamous|JJ Bernardo|NNP Flynn|NNP that|IN I|PRP merely|RB raised|VBD an|DT eyebrow|NN in|IN mild|JJ scepticism|NN .|. 
And|CC then|RB ,|, because|IN a|DT playwright|NN cannot|NN resist|VBP a|DT promising|JJ line|NN ,|, I|PRP said|VBD ,|, "|'' Your|PRP$ Sleeping|VBG Flamingo|NNP should|MD be|VB put|VBN to|TO sleep|VB .|. "|'' 

To|TO say|VB her|PRP$ face|NN fell|VBD would|MD do|VB a|DT disservice|NN to|TO Tasha|NNP and|CC to|TO literature|NN .|. 
(|( Allow|VB me|PRP my|PRP$ self|NN -|- indulgences|NNS as|IN you|PRP would|MD those|DT of|IN a|DT dying|VBG man|NN -|- -|- when|WRB I|PRP convince|VBP my|PRP$ mindsmith|NN to|TO permit|VB the|DT wipe|VB ,|, there|EX will|MD be|VB another|DT Bernardo|NNP Flynn|NNP ,|, one|CD who|WP knows|VBZ no|DT more|JJR of|IN Tasha|NNP Cortez|NNP or|CC Vega|NNP IV|NNP than|IN he|PRP reads|VBZ here|RB .|. )|) 
Her|PRP$ brows|NNS drew|VBD together|RB ,|, creasing|VBG the|DT lovely|JJ ,|, caramel|JJ -|- colored|VBN skin|NN around|IN her|PRP$ eyes|NNS and|CC showing|VBG the|DT pattern|NN for|IN an|DT old|JJ woman|NN 's|POS wrinkles|NNS on|IN her|PRP$ forehead|NN .|. 
Her|PRP$ lower|JJR lip|NN (|( a|DT trifle|RB too|RB narrow|JJ for|IN her|PRP$ face|NN ,|, perhaps|RB her|PRP$ only|RB physical|JJ flaw|NN )|) thrust|NN forward|RB slightly|RB as|IN she|PRP started|VBD to|TO speak|VB .|. 
She|PRP caught|VBD herself|PRP ,|, slid|VBD her|PRP$ jaw|NN infinitesimally|RB back|RB into|IN place|NN ,|, and|CC said|VBD ,|, "|'' You|PRP do|VBP n't|RB like|VB it|PRP ?|. "|'' 

I|PRP laughed|VBD .|. 
What|WP could|MD I|PRP do|VB ?|. 
I|PRP clapped|JJ her|PRP$ shoulder|NN to|TO show|VB I|PRP was|VBD not|RB laughing|VBG at|IN her|PRP .|. 
"|'' Like|IN it|PRP ?|. 
I|PRP hate|VBP it|PRP ,|, despise|VB it|PRP ,|, abhor|NN it|PRP !|. 
It|PRP 's|VBZ gaudy|NN ,|, graceless|JJ ,|, pretentious|JJ -|- -|- That|DT house|NN is|VBZ an|DT affront|NN to|TO taste|VB and|CC intelligence|NN .|. 
I|PRP should|MD buy|VB it|PRP to|TO raze|NN it|PRP ,|, but|CC I|PRP am|VBP not|RB so|RB kind|JJ -|- hearted|JJ .|. 
I|PRP might|MD ,|, however|RB ,|, rent|NN it|PRP .|. "|'' 

I|PRP think|VBP she|PRP only|RB heard|VBD the|DT last|JJ words|NNS of|IN my|PRP$ speech|NN .|. 
"|'' You|PRP will|MD ?|. "|'' 

"|'' It|PRP amuses|NNS me|PRP .|. 
Show|NNP me|PRP around|IN ,|, and|CC then|RB I|PRP shall|MD decide|VB .|. "|'' 

"|'' Of|IN course|NN ,|, Señor|NNP Flynn|NNP .|. "|'' 

"|'' And|CC stop|VB calling|VBG me|PRP '|POS señor|NN '|'' .|. 
Not|RB even|RB Los|NNP Mundos|NNP is|VBZ so|RB polite|JJ .|. 
Call|VB me|PRP Bernardo|NNP .|. "|'' 

"|'' If|IN you|PRP wish|VBP .|. "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP beg|VB you|PRP ,|, change|NN the|DT color|NN of|IN the|DT walls|NNS ,|, at|IN the|DT very|RB least|JJS .|. "|'' 

"|'' But|CC of|IN course|NN !|. "|'' 
The|DT house|NN walls|NNS shifted|VBN from|IN pink|JJ to|TO lavender|NN .|. 

I|PRP stared|VBD .|. 

"|'' How|WRB 's|POS that|DT ?|. "|'' 

I|PRP looked|VBD at|IN her|PRP .|. 

"|'' Worse|JJR ?|. "|'' 

I|PRP nodded|JJ .|. 
"|'' I|PRP would|MD not|RB have|VB thought|VBN it|PRP possible|JJ .|. "|'' 

She|PRP frowned|JJ .|. 
"|'' It|PRP is|VBZ rather|RB ugly|JJ .|. "|'' 

"|'' Thoroughly|NNP ugly|JJ ,|, "|'' I|PRP corrected|VBD with|IN smile|NN .|. 

"|'' Obscenely|NNP ugly|JJ ,|, "|'' said|VBD she|PRP ,|, smiling|VBG too|RB .|. 

"|'' No.|NN "|'' 
I|PRP pointed|VBD .|. 
"|'' It|PRP has|VBZ no|DT tower|NN .|. "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP can|MD fix|VB that|DT .|. "|'' 
She|PRP reached|VBD for|IN another|DT dial|NN on|IN the|DT house|NN controls|NNS .|. 

"|'' Do|VBP n't|RB you|PRP dare|VBP !|. "|'' 
Her|PRP$ wrist|NN ,|, when|WRB I|PRP grabbed|VBD it|PRP ,|, was|VBD smooth|JJ and|CC strong|JJ and|CC warm|JJ in|IN my|PRP$ fingers|NNS .|. 
"|'' I|PRP 'll|MD take|VB it|PRP .|. 
Exactly|RB as|IN it|PRP is|VBZ .|. "|'' 

"|'' You|PRP will|MD ?|. "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP must|MD .|. 
God|NNP knows|VBZ what|WP you|PRP might|MD do|VB to|TO it|PRP next|JJ .|. "|'' 
Reluctantly|NNP ,|, I|PRP released|VBD her|PRP$ hand|NN .|. 

The|DT interior|NN of|IN The|DT Flamingo|NNP was|VBD a|DT welcome|JJ surprise|NN .|. 
Cloudwood|NNP had|VBD been|VBN used|VBN in|IN a|DT Mediterranean|NNP manner|NN ,|, making|VBG the|DT house|NN seem|VBP primitive|JJ and|CC civilized|JJ at|IN the|DT same|JJ time|NN .|. 
The|DT kitchen|NN and|CC baths|NNS had|VBD every|DT convenience|NN that|IN I|PRP desired|VBD .|. 
From|IN the|DT living|VBG room|NN ,|, the|DT view|NN of|IN the|DT beach|NN struck|VBD me|PRP with|IN such|JJ intensity|NN that|IN Tasha|NNP asked|VBD if|IN I|PRP felt|VBD ill|JJ .|. 
All|DT I|PRP could|MD say|VB was|VBD ,|, "|'' No.|NN 
I|PRP 'm|VBP in|IN love|NN .|. "|'' 
We|PRP both|DT thought|VBD I|PRP referred|VBD to|TO the|DT vista|NN .|. 

It|PRP 's|VBZ strange|JJ how|WRB one|PRP can|MD write|VB delightedly|RB of|IN the|DT happier|JJR moments|NNS of|IN life|NN ,|, forgetting|VBG the|DT things|NNS that|IN one|PRP would|MD forget|VB by|IN remembering|VBG fully|RB the|DT things|NNS one|PRP would|MD remember|VB ,|, and|CC suddenly|RB the|DT forgotten|VBN ,|, in|IN revenge|NN ,|, rears|NNS up|IN to|TO savage|NN the|DT unwary|JJ .|. 
So|IN it|PRP was|VBD as|IN I|PRP wrote|VBD the|DT preceding|VBG .|. 
My|PRP$ heart|NN convulsed|JJ ,|, and|CC I|PRP left|VBD this|DT manuscript|NN for|IN a|DT three|CD -|- day|NN spree|NN .|. 
Apparently|RB I|PRP was|VBD so|RB successful|JJ that|IN it|PRP lasted|VBD a|DT week|NN and|CC a|DT half|NN .|. 
Not|RB bad|JJ for|IN an|DT eighty|CD -|- three|CD -|- year|NN -|- old|JJ ,|, even|RB for|IN one|CD who|WP has|VBZ his|PRP$ rejuve|NN every|DT month|NN .|. 
And|CC if|IN I|PRP can|MD brag|VB and|CC digress|NNS so|RB easily|RB ,|, this|DT must|MD not|RB be|VB painful|JJ enough|RB to|TO merit|VB a|DT mindwipe|NN ,|, yes|UH ?|. 

No.|NN 
I|PRP abandoned|VBD these|DT notes|NNS to|TO my|PRP$ future|JJ self|NN to|TO have|VB the|DT wipe|VB done|VBN immediately|RB ,|, thinking|VBG that|IN Bernardo|NNP Flynn|NNP should|MD receive|VB such|JJ services|NNS when|WRB he|PRP needed|VBD them|PRP ,|, even|RB should|MD the|DT need|NN arise|VB at|IN the|DT third|JJ hour|NN after|IN midnight|NN .|. 
My|PRP$ mindsmith|NN is|VBZ not|RB so|RB understanding|NN .|. 
She|PRP says|VBZ I|PRP am|VBP emotionally|RB a|DT child|NN ,|, to|TO which|WDT I|PRP reply|VB ,|, "|'' Of|IN course|NN .|. 
Why|WRB else|RB would|MD I|PRP come|VB to|TO you|PRP ?|. "|'' 
This|DT logic|NN does|VBZ not|RB soothe|VB her|PRP$ ;|: she|PRP says|VBZ I|PRP must|MD wait|VB three|CD weeks|NNS .|. 
Three|CD !|. 
.|. 
Such|JJ is|VBZ the|DT law|NN .|. 
I|PRP say|VBP I|PRP do|VBP not|RB care|VB about|IN law|NN ,|, I|PRP care|VBP about|IN service|NN and|CC she|PRP should|MD care|VB about|IN money|NN .|. 
Enough|JJ .|. 
I|PRP went|VBD on|IN a|DT spree|NN ,|, and|CC it|PRP must|MD have|VB been|VBN a|DT good|JJ one|CD .|. 
I|PRP hope|VBP the|DT wipe|VB is|VBZ as|IN successful|JJ with|IN my|PRP$ time|NN on|IN Vega|NNP IV|NNP as|IN my|PRP$ spree|NN was|VBD with|IN my|PRP$ time|NN here|RB .|. 
I|PRP dimly|RB remember|VBP three|CD bedpartners|NNS who|WP were|VBD probably|RB human|JJ ,|, and|CC one|CD that|IN I|PRP hope|VBP was|VBD delirium|NN .|. 
I|PRP will|MD not|RB answer|VB the|DT phone|NN for|IN a|DT week|NN ,|, no|DT matter|NN whose|WP$ face|NN appears|VBZ on|IN it|PRP .|. 

I|PRP keep|VBP evading|VBG the|DT issue|NN .|. 
But|CC which|WDT issue|VBP ?|. 
The|DT issue|NN of|IN why|WRB I|PRP am|VBP evading|VBG the|DT issue|NN ,|, or|CC the|DT issue|NN itself|PRP ?|. 
To|TO deal|VB with|IN the|DT first|JJ :|: it|PRP hurts|VBZ to|TO remember|VB .|. 
If|IN I|PRP am|VBP capable|JJ of|IN love|NN ,|, I|PRP loved|VBD Tasha|NNP Cortez|NNP .|. 
If|IN I|PRP am|VBP not|RB ,|, I|PRP had|VBD the|DT perfect|JJ mirror|VBP for|IN my|PRP$ narcissism|NN .|. 

As|IN for|IN the|DT issue|NN itself|PRP ,|, I|PRP 'm|VBP no|DT longer|RB sure|JJ what|WP I|PRP want|VBP to|TO record|VB .|. 
The|DT playwright|NN in|IN me|PRP wants|VBZ every|DT scene|NN of|IN our|PRP$ time|NN together|RB .|. 
The|DT editor|NN says|VBZ no|DT ,|, only|RB those|DT that|WDT are|VBP relevant|JJ .|. 
The|DT sufferer|NN says|VBZ no|DT ,|, only|RB those|DT which|WDT cause|VBP no|DT pain|NN .|. 
And|CC the|DT artist|NN says|VBZ no|DT ,|, only|RB those|DT which|WDT cause|VBP the|DT most|JJS pain|NN ,|, for|IN those|DT would|MD be|VB the|DT truest|NN memories|NNS .|. 

So|IN I|PRP shall|MD soothe|VB my|PRP$ quarreling|VBG selves|NNS with|IN a|DT compromise|NN .|. 
I|PRP will|MD not|RB talk|VB of|IN the|DT first|JJ time|NN Tasha|NNP and|CC I|PRP tried|VBD any|DT act|NN of|IN sex|NN or|CC sport|NN together|RB .|. 
I|PRP can|MD remember|VB similar|JJ things|NNS with|IN others|NNS .|. 
Tasha|NNP 's|POS witchery|NN lay|VB in|IN making|VBG old|JJ acts|NNS new|JJ .|. 
Is|VBZ that|DT love|NN ?|. 
Probably|RB not|RB .|. 
But|CC it|PRP is|VBZ something|NN marvelous|JJ and|CC rare|JJ ,|, which|WDT is|VBZ surely|RB a|DT sign|NN of|IN love|NN .|. 

If|IN my|PRP$ love|NN for|IN her|PRP$ was|VBD the|DT only|RB important|JJ thing|NN ,|, I|PRP would|MD leave|VB a|DT holo|NN of|IN her|PRP with|IN a|DT note|NN :|: "|'' Dear|RB Future|NNP ,|, this|DT is|VBZ Tasha|NNP Cortez|NNP .|. 
You|PRP loved|VBD her|PRP .|. 
With|IN warmest|NN regards|VBZ ,|, Your|PRP$ Past|JJ .|. "|'' 

Enough|JJ .|. 
Tasha|NNP and|CC I|PRP walked|VBD through|IN The|DT Sleeping|VBG Flamingo|NNP together|RB ,|, and|CC I|PRP decided|VBD to|TO buy|VB it|PRP .|. 
Then|RB -|- -|- 

This|DT is|VBZ not|RB easy|JJ .|. 
I|PRP stand|VBP up|RB ,|, I|PRP walk|VBP around|RB ,|, I|PRP pretend|VB someone|NN makes|VBZ a|DT vid|NN about|IN a|DT writer|NN and|CC I|PRP must|MD enact|VB every|DT cliche|NN .|. 
I|PRP cannot|NN decide|VB what|WP 's|VBZ important|JJ .|. 
But|CC I|PRP have|VBP learned|VBN something|NN :|: writing|VBG trivializes|NNS .|. 
The|DT Tasha|NNP who|WP was|VBD is|VBZ not|RB the|DT Tasha|NNP in|IN this|DT file|NN .|. 
The|DT Tasha|NNP in|IN this|DT file|NN is|VBZ not|RB even|RB the|DT Tasha|NNP I|PRP loved|VBD and|CC thought|VBD I|PRP knew|VBD .|. 
The|DT Tasha|NNP in|IN this|DT file|NN would|MD walk|VB through|IN a|DT net|JJ show|NN in|IN half|PDT an|DT hour|NN ,|, including|VBG commercials|NNS ,|, and|CC just|RB before|IN an|DT ad|NN for|IN Figuero|NNP 's|POS Flash|NNP Diapers|NNP -|- -|- Keeps|NNP Baby|NNP Driest|NNP !|. 
,|, she|PRP -|- -|- 

Tasha|NNP is|VBZ not|RB the|DT whole|NN of|IN what|WP happened|VBD on|IN Vega|NNP IV|NNP .|. 
I|PRP must|MD also|RB write|VB about|IN Emiliano|NNP Gabriel|NNP Malaquez|NNP .|. 

Future|JJ Self|NN ,|, you|PRP know|VBP our|PRP$ style|NN well|RB enough|RB to|TO tell|VB that|DT time|NN has|VBZ passed|VBN between|IN the|DT last|JJ sentence|NN and|CC this|DT .|. 
Not|RB another|DT spree|NN -|- -|- at|IN least|JJS ,|, not|RB like|IN the|DT other|JJ .|. 
I|PRP have|VBP been|VBN re-reading|JJ all|DT our|PRP$ favorite|JJ books|NNS -|- -|- 

But|CC neither|DT of|IN us|PRP care|VBP to|TO dwell|NN on|IN such|JJ boring|JJ subjects|NNS ,|, do|VBP we|PRP ?|. 

I|PRP want|VBP to|TO pick|VB up|RP with|IN Tasha|NNP and|CC me|PRP walking|VBG about|IN The|DT Sleeping|VBG Flamingo|NNP ,|, and|CC then|RB ,|, for|IN the|DT sake|NN of|IN literary|JJ convenience|NN ,|, to|TO say|VB that|IN from|IN a|DT corner|NN of|IN the|DT yard|NN I|PRP saw|VBD a|DT neighboring|VBG house|NN ,|, and|CC the|DT sight|NN filled|VBD me|PRP with|IN darkest|NN forebodings|NNS .|. 
But|CC the|DT truth|NN is|VBZ that|IN Tasha|NNP pointed|VBD it|PRP out|IN from|IN the|DT one|CD place|NN where|WRB it|PRP could|MD barely|RB be|VB seen|VBN ,|, and|CC I|PRP only|RB felt|VBD envy|NN that|IN it|PRP had|VBD been|VBN designed|VBN by|IN someone|NN with|IN understated|VBN good|JJ taste|NN .|. 
"|'' Who|WP lives|NNS there|RB ?|. "|'' 
I|PRP asked|VBD .|. 

"|'' No|DT one|NN ,|, "|'' Tasha|NNP replied|VBD .|. 

Truth|NNP is|VBZ always|RB more|RBR boring|JJ than|IN fiction|NN .|. 
For|IN Malaquez|NNP did|VBD not|RB move|VB into|IN Dream|NN 's|POS End|NN until|IN four|CD or|CC five|CD months|NNS after|IN I|PRP -|- -|- we|PRP ?|. 
how|WRB does|VBZ one|CD speak|VB to|TO one|CD 's|POS future|JJ self|NN ?|. 
-|- -|- occupied|VBD The|DT Flamingo|NNP .|. 

I|PRP do|VBP not|RB plan|VB to|TO write|VB a|DT book|NN :|: this|DT narrative|NN must|MD move|VB more|RBR quickly|RB .|. 
Tasha|NNP and|CC I|PRP became|VBD lovers|NNS that|WDT evening|NN ,|, after|IN a|DT good|JJ dinner|NN of|IN paella|NN at|IN her|PRP$ apartment|NN .|. 
I|PRP made|VBD some|DT small|JJ joke|NN afterward|RB ,|, about|IN approving|VBG of|IN her|PRP$ firm|NN 's|POS business|NN incentives|NNS ,|, and|CC she|PRP cried|JJ .|. 
Consoling|NNP her|PRP$ ,|, I|PRP began|VBD to|TO suspect|VB I|PRP loved|VBD her|PRP .|. 
I|PRP moved|VBD into|IN The|DT Flamingo|NNP the|DT next|JJ day|NN ;|: and|CC she|PRP gave|VBD up|RP her|PRP$ apartment|NN three|CD weeks|NNS later|RB to|TO join|VB me|PRP .|. 
It|PRP was|VBD the|DT sort|NN of|IN romance|NN that|WDT happens|VBZ so|RB rarely|RB that|IN most|JJS people|NNS believe|VBP it|PRP does|VBZ not|RB happen|VB at|IN all|DT ,|, the|DT sort|NN of|IN romance|NN that|WDT sustains|VBZ the|DT hopeless|JJ billions|NNS who|WP regularly|RB watch|VBP A|DT Wandering|NNP Star|NNP Called|VBD Love|NN .|. 
(|( Which|WDT is|VBZ to|TO say|VB ,|, you|PRP and|CC me|PRP ,|, Future|NNP Self|NN .|. )|) 

Who|WP was|VBD Tasha|NNP Cortez|NNP ?|. 
She|PRP was|VBD a|DT twenty|CD -|- four|CD -|- year|NN -|- old|JJ (|( Terran|NNP Standard|NNP )|) N|NNP '|POS Apulcan|NNP who|WP left|VBD university|NN training|NN in|IN hydroponics|NNS to|TO work|VB for|IN her|PRP$ aunt|NN 's|POS real|JJ estate|NN firm|NN .|. 
Her|PRP$ family|NN said|VBD she|PRP did|VBD it|PRP to|TO support|VB her|PRP$ father|NN ,|, who|WP was|VBD dying|VBG of|IN a|DT particularly|RB painful|JJ degenerative|JJ disease|NN .|. 
Tasha|NNP said|VBD she|PRP woke|VBD up|RB one|CD morning|NN convinced|VBN that|IN if|IN she|PRP spent|VBD another|DT day|NN studying|VBG vegetables|NNS ,|, she|PRP would|MD become|VB one|CD .|. 

She|PRP did|VBD not|RB like|IN my|PRP$ plays|NNS .|. 
I|PRP had|VBD impressed|VBN her|PRP because|IN I|PRP was|VBD famous|JJ and|CC amusing|JJ and|CC not|RB ,|, as|IN I|PRP had|VBD hoped|VBN ,|, because|IN I|PRP was|VBD a|DT great|JJ artist|NN .|. 
That|DT bothered|VBN (|( yes|UH ,|, and|CC intrigued|VBN )|) me|PRP until|IN I|PRP realized|VBD that|IN she|PRP was|VBD bored|VBN by|IN most|JJS plays|VBZ ,|, movies|NNS ,|, and|CC vid|NN .|. 
She|PRP did|VBD not|RB like|IN being|VBG a|DT spectator|NN .|. 
I|PRP often|RB told|VBD her|PRP that|IN she|PRP should|MD have|VB a|DT bio-check|NN to|TO see|VB if|IN she|PRP suffered|VBD from|IN some|DT metabolic|JJ imbalance|NN .|. 
I|PRP often|RB told|VBD her|PRP$ too|RB many|JJ things|NNS .|. 

Search|NNP "|'' Emiliano|NNP Malaquez|NNP "|'' and|CC you|PRP 'll|MD find|VB he|PRP 's|VBZ a|DT master|NN of|IN the|DT "|'' captured|VBN moment|NN "|'' school|NN of|IN sculpture|NN .|. 
Even|RB The|DT Terran|NNP Times|NNP has|VBZ only|RB praise|NN for|IN his|PRP$ work|NN .|. 
To|TO compare|VB his|PRP$ pieces|NNS to|TO those|DT of|IN others|NNS is|VBZ to|TO compare|VB mannequins|NNS to|TO living|VBG models|NNS .|. 
He|PRP accents|NNS the|DT illusion|NN of|IN reality|NN -|- -|- I|PRP paraphrase|VBP his|PRP$ entry|NN in|IN La|NNP Enciclopedia|NNP Humanica|NNP -|- -|- by|IN doing|VBG life|NN -|- size|NN scenes|NNS in|IN "|'' the|DT full|JJ round|NN ,|, "|'' never|RB the|DT easier|RBR frontal|JJ or|CC three|CD -|- quarters|NNS view|VBP .|. 
Moreover|RB ,|, he|PRP never|RB did|VBD portraits|NNS of|IN famous|JJ people|NNS ;|: his|PRP$ works|NNS were|VBD therefore|RB the|DT reality|NN and|CC could|MD never|RB be|VB compared|VBN to|TO it|PRP .|. 
As|IN is|VBZ typical|JJ of|IN his|PRP$ school|NN ,|, his|PRP$ pieces|NNS are|VBP sealed|VBN in|IN stopboxes|NNS .|. 
The|DT shimmer|NN of|IN light|JJ on|IN their|PRP$ surfaces|VBZ always|RB reminds|VBZ us|PRP that|IN we|PRP 're|VBP looking|VBG at|IN an|DT instant|JJ snatched|VBN from|IN under|IN the|DT hooves|NNS of|IN time|NN .|. 
They|PRP say|VBP the|DT cubes|NNS will|MD outlast|VB planets|NNS and|CC suns|NNS ,|, that|IN when|WRB the|DT universe|NN dies|VBZ ,|, the|DT works|NNS of|IN Malaquez|NNP and|CC his|PRP$ followers|NNS will|MD be|VB the|DT last|JJ things|NNS seen|VBN in|IN the|DT final|JJ wink|NN of|IN God|NNP 's|POS eye|NN .|. 

Yes|UH ,|, Self|NN ,|, I|PRP am|VBP also|RB bothered|VBN that|IN this|DT observation|NN ignores|VBZ half|JJ -|- eaten|VBN cheese|NN sandwiches|NNS ,|, incomplete|JJ insect|NN collections|NNS ,|, and|CC locks|NNS of|IN infants|NNS '|POS hair|NN ,|, forgotten|VBN in|IN closets|NNS ,|, basements|NNS ,|, and|CC warehouses|NNS .|. 

You|PRP see|VBP the|DT inspiration|NN for|IN my|PRP$ latest|JJS play|VB ,|, "|'' Captured|NNP Moments|NNP .|. "|'' 
The|DT mindwipe|NN will|MD take|VB its|PRP$ creation|NN from|IN my|PRP$ future|JJ self|NN -|- -|- but|CC time|NN too|RB often|RB does|VBZ that|IN without|IN aid|NN .|. 
The|DT play|NN 's|POS second|JJ act|NN concludes|VBZ with|IN the|DT last|JJ fight|NN between|IN Tasha|NNP and|CC me|PRP .|. 
I|PRP have|VBP disguised|VBN us|PRP in|IN the|DT play|NN ,|, and|CC deleted|VBN one|CD brief|JJ melodramatic|JJ interchange|NN .|. 
Now|RB I|PRP will|MD mention|VB it|PRP ,|, in|IN case|NN I|PRP /|NN You|PRP decide|VBP to|TO restore|VB it|PRP .|. 
Shortly|RB before|IN she|PRP left|VBD ,|, Tasha|NNP said|VBD ,|, "|'' You|PRP steal|VBP from|IN life|NN for|IN art|NN ,|, Bernardo|NNP .|. 
You|PRP 'll|MD impoverish|NN yourself|PRP .|. "|'' 
I|PRP only|RB snarled|JJ at|IN her|PRP$ and|CC -|- -|- 

My|PRP$ story|NN leaps|NNS ahead|RB of|IN itself|PRP .|. 
Let|VB me|PRP retreat|NN and|CC retrench|VBP :|: 

One|CD night|NN during|IN N|NNP '|POS apulco|NN 's|POS mild|JJ winter|NN ,|, Tasha|NNP returned|VBD to|TO The|DT Flamingo|NNP ,|, saying|VBG ,|, "|'' Nardo|NNP !|. 
Nardo|NNP !|. 
Guess|NNP what|WP ?|. "|'' 

My|PRP$ mind|NN was|VBD on|IN other|JJ things|NNS .|. 
"|'' You|PRP wish|VBP to|TO become|VB pregnant|JJ ?|. 
I|PRP suppose|VBP I|PRP could|MD assist|VB a|DT friend|NN .|. 
Purely|NNP for|IN the|DT sake|NN of|IN the|DT race|NN ,|, of|IN course|NN -|- -|- "|'' 

"|'' Ever|RB the|DT altruist|NN .|. 
Still|RB ,|, if|IN I|PRP do|VBP decide|VB ,|, we|PRP could|MD practice|VB -|- -|- "|'' 

Later|RB ,|, I|PRP said|VBD ,|, "|'' You|PRP 've|VBP been|VBN chosen|VBN to|TO succeed|VB the|DT Emperor|NNP .|. "|'' 

"|'' What|WP ?|. "|'' 

"|'' My|PRP$ guess|VBP .|. "|'' 

She|PRP batted|VBD at|IN my|PRP$ nose|NN like|IN a|DT cat|NN .|. 
"|'' Silly|NNP Nardo|NNP .|. "|'' 

"|'' Then|RB I|PRP give|VBP up|RB .|. "|'' 

"|'' Emil|NNP Malaquez|NNP is|VBZ buying|VBG the|DT house|NN up|RP the|DT hill|NN .|. "|'' 

"|'' Oh|UH .|. "|'' 

"|'' You|PRP do|VBP n't|RB know|VB who|WP he|PRP is|VBZ ?|. "|'' 

"|'' Well|RB ...|... "|'' 

"|'' Nardo|NNP !|. "|'' 
One|CD of|IN the|DT many|JJ things|NNS I|PRP liked|VBD about|IN her|PRP$ was|VBD that|IN she|PRP often|RB thought|VBD me|PRP shockingly|RB ignorant|NN .|. 

"|'' That|DT 's|VBZ ,|, uh|UH ...|... "|'' 
I|PRP am|VBP never|RB so|RB quick|JJ -|- witted|JJ in|IN person|NN as|IN I|PRP am|VBP on|IN the|DT page|NN .|. 
Especially|RB when|WRB someone|NN thinks|VBZ me|PRP shockingly|RB ignorant|NN .|. 

"|'' You|PRP know|VBP ,|, the|DT sculptor|NN .|. 
He|PRP 's|VBZ had|VBD shows|VBZ in|IN Brazil|NNP and|CC New|NNP Madrid|NNP and|CC everywhere|RB !|. 
He|PRP may|MD be|VB more|RBR famous|JJ than|IN you|PRP .|. "|'' 

"|'' Imagine|VB that|DT .|. "|'' 
I|PRP remembered|VBD an|DT article|NN in|IN The|DT Medusa|NNP and|CC a|DT photo|NN of|IN a|DT work|NN in|IN which|WDT 100|CD -|- peso|NN notes|NNS fell|VBD like|IN confetti|NN onto|IN a|DT small|JJ Undersider|NNP ,|, sexlessly|RB young|JJ in|IN grimy|NN ,|, oversized|JJ clothing|NN .|. 
The|DT child|NN 's|POS face|NN was|VBD a|DT warground|NN for|IN wonder|VBP and|CC mistrust|NN .|. 
Imprisoned|VBN light|JJ from|IN forgotten|VBN streetlamps|NNS snagged|VBN itself|PRP on|IN metal|NN threads|NNS in|IN the|DT fluttering|VBG pesos|NNS .|. 
The|DT stars|NNS themselves|PRP might|MD have|VB fallen|VBN on|IN the|DT Undersider|NNP and|CC the|DT event|NN would|MD have|VB been|VBN no|DT less|RBR strange|JJ ,|, no|DT less|RBR miraculous|JJ .|. 
"|'' A|DT great|JJ artist|NN will|MD grace|VB this|DT world|NN ,|, then|RB ?|. "|'' 

"|'' Nardo|NNP !|. "|'' 
She|PRP was|VBD never|RB tolerant|NN of|IN my|PRP$ ego|NN .|. 

"|'' Well|RB .|. 
What|WP 's|VBZ this|DT more|JJR -|- famous|JJ -|- than|IN -|- me|PRP person|NN like|IN ?|. "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP did|VBD n't|RB meet|VB him|PRP ,|, jealous|JJ old|JJ one|CD .|. "|'' 

"|'' Too|RB bad|JJ .|. 
If|IN I|PRP thought|VBD he|PRP could|MD free|VB me|PRP from|IN you|PRP -|- -|- "|'' 

"|'' Hah|NNP !|. "|'' 
She|PRP wrapped|VBD her|PRP$ arms|NNS around|IN my|PRP$ stomach|NN .|. 
"|'' You|PRP 'll|MD never|RB be|VB free|JJ of|IN me|PRP ,|, old|JJ man|NN !|. "|'' 

The|DT next|JJ evening|NN ,|, she|PRP arrived|VBD with|IN a|DT stack|VB of|IN glistening|VBG stopboxes|NNS containing|VBG sushi|NN ,|, sashimi|NN ,|, oysters|NNS in|IN their|PRP$ shells|NNS ,|, and|CC Terran|NNP vegetables|NNS fresh|JJ plucked|VBN from|IN their|PRP$ hydroponic|JJ beds|NNS .|. 
Wondering|NNP about|IN the|DT reason|NN for|IN her|PRP$ extravagance|NN ,|, I|PRP asked|VBD how|WRB work|NN had|VBD gone|VBN that|DT day|NN .|. 

"|'' Emil|NNP came|VBD in|IN .|. 
He|PRP 's|VBZ taking|VBG Dream|NN 's|POS End|NN .|. "|'' 

"|'' Emil|NNP ?|. "|'' 

"|'' You|PRP 've|VBP no|DT memory|NN left|VBD ,|, old|JJ one|CD .|. 
Emil|NNP Malaquez|NNP .|. "|'' 

"|'' Ah|UH .|. 
You|PRP did|VBD that|IN to|TO test|VB my|PRP$ affections|NNS .|. "|'' 

"|'' What|WP ?|. "|'' 

"|'' Calling|VBG him|PRP by|IN his|PRP$ first|JJ name|NN .|. 
I|PRP did|VBD that|IN in|IN a|DT comedy|NN once|RB .|. 
'|POS Nights|NNPS with|IN Karl|NNP and|CC Groucho|NNP .|. '|POS 
It|PRP was|VBD before|IN your|PRP$ time|NN .|. "|'' 

"|'' Oh|UH .|. "|'' 

"|'' The|DT critics|NNS liked|VBD it|PRP .|. "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP 'm|VBP glad|JJ .|. "|'' 
A|DT moment|NN later|RB :|: "|'' That|DT 's|VBZ not|RB why|WRB I|PRP called|VBD him|PRP '|POS Emil|NNP '|'' .|. "|'' 

"|'' No|UH ?|. "|'' 

"|'' No.|NN 
We|PRP lunched|JJ together|RB .|. 
He|PRP 's|VBZ nice|JJ .|. "|'' 

"|'' Oh|UH .|. "|'' 

"|'' It|PRP was|VBD n't|RB like|VB that|DT .|. "|'' 

"|'' You|PRP 're|VBP free|JJ .|. "|'' 

"|'' Of|IN course|NN .|. 
Still|RB ,|, it|PRP was|VBD n't|RB like|VB that|DT .|. 
You|PRP think|VBP I|PRP sleep|VBP with|IN every|DT famous|JJ person|NN I|PRP meet|VBP ?|. "|'' 

As|IN you|PRP may|MD have|VB guessed|VBD ,|, we|PRP had|VBD talked|VBN about|IN such|JJ things|NNS .|. 
I|PRP do|VBP not|RB claim|VB ours|PRP was|VBD a|DT perfect|JJ affair|NN ,|, only|RB a|DT wonderful|JJ one|CD .|. 

"|'' Tasha|NNP -|- -|- "|'' 

"|'' Do|VBP you|PRP ?|. "|'' 

"|'' No.|NN "|'' 

"|'' Good|JJ .|. 
I|PRP invited|VBD him|PRP to|TO dinner|NN tomorrow|NN .|. "|'' 

"|'' Oh|UH ?|. "|'' 

"|'' He|PRP 'll|MD be|VB our|PRP$ neighbor|NN .|. 
You|PRP say|VBP we|PRP 're|VBP becoming|VBG too|RB insular|NN ,|, that|IN we|PRP need|VBP to|TO socialize|VB -|- -|- "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP 've|VBP socialized|JJ for|IN sixty|CD -|- three|CD years|NNS .|. "|'' 

"|'' Nardo|NNP ?|. "|'' 

"|'' Yes|UH ?|. "|'' 

"|'' How|WRB should|MD I|PRP reply|VB ?|. "|'' 
Her|PRP$ voice|NN had|VBD grown|VBN quiet|JJ ,|, and|CC I|PRP began|VBD to|TO feel|VB some|DT guilt|NN .|. 
I|PRP had|VBD ,|, it|PRP is|VBZ true|JJ ,|, told|VBD her|PRP that|IN we|PRP needed|VBD other|JJ company|NN than|IN our|PRP$ own|JJ .|. 
I|PRP said|VBD this|DT from|IN years|NNS of|IN learning|VBG that|IN romances|NNS consume|VBP themselves|PRP without|IN other|JJ fuel|NN .|. 
But|CC knowing|VBG this|DT did|VBD not|RB mean|VB I|PRP wanted|VBD it|PRP .|. 

I|PRP said|VBD ,|, "|'' Truthfully|NNP .|. "|'' 
It|PRP was|VBD the|DT statement|NN of|IN a|DT younger|JJR and|CC crueler|NN man|NN than|IN I.|NN 

She|PRP screamed|VBD ,|, "|'' I|PRP have|VBP n't|RB socialized|JJ with|IN Terra|NNP 's|POS elite|NN for|IN most|JJS of|IN my|PRP$ life|NN !|. 
I|PRP have|VBP n't|RB socialized|JJ with|IN hardly|RB anyone|NN for|IN hardly|RB any|DT of|IN my|PRP$ life|NN !|. 
And|CC I|PRP invite|VB a|DT neighbor|NN ,|, one|CD nice|JJ ,|, lonely|JJ man|NN -|- -|- "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP 'm|VBP sorry|JJ .|. "|'' 

"|'' -|- -|- who|WP took|VBD me|PRP to|TO -|- -|- What|WP ?|. "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP 'm|VBP sorry|JJ .|. 
Truly|NNP .|. "|'' 

"|'' Oh|UH .|. "|'' 
She|PRP studied|VBD me|PRP as|IN a|DT suspicious|JJ puppy|NN might|MD ,|, then|RB said|VBD ,|, "|'' I|PRP 'm|VBP sorry|JJ ,|, too|RB .|. "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP suppose|VBP I|PRP sound|VBP like|IN I|PRP 'm|VBP bragging|NN when|WRB I|PRP talk|NN of|IN the|DT things|NNS I|PRP 'm|VBP tired|JJ of|IN .|. "|'' 

"|'' Only|RB because|IN you|PRP are|VBP .|. "|'' 
She|PRP smiled|VBD .|. 

I|PRP had|VBD to|TO grin|NN ,|, so|IN I|PRP did|VBD .|. 
"|'' True|JJ .|. "|'' 

"|'' He|PRP may|MD come|VB to|TO dinner|NN ?|. "|'' 

"|'' If|IN you|PRP wish|VBP ,|, he|PRP may|MD be|VB dinner|NN .|. "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP love|VBP you|PRP .|. "|'' 

"|'' And|CC I|PRP ,|, you|PRP .|. "|'' 
Months|NNS earlier|RBR ,|, we|PRP might|MD have|VB sought|VBN a|DT bed|NN ,|, a|DT couch|NN ,|, or|CC a|DT comfortable|JJ chair|NN at|IN this|DT point|NN .|. 
Instead|RB ,|, I|PRP asked|VBD ,|, "|'' Is|VBZ he|PRP handsome|JJ ?|. "|'' 

"|'' You|PRP 're|VBP jealous|JJ .|. "|'' 

"|'' A|DT tiny|JJ bit|NN .|. 
Extremely|NNP .|. "|'' 

"|'' Content|NNP yourself|PRP ,|, old|JJ one|CD .|. 
He|PRP 's|VBZ four|CD inches|NNS shorter|JJR than|IN I|PRP ,|, his|PRP$ nose|NN is|VBZ big|JJ and|CC broken|VBN ,|, and|CC -|- -|- "|'' 

"|'' This|DT is|VBZ cosmetic|JJ ?|. "|'' 

"|'' He|PRP 's|VBZ not|RB that|DT ugly|JJ .|. 
I|PRP think|VBP they|PRP 're|VBP his|PRP$ natural|JJ features|NNS .|. "|'' 

"|'' Interesting|JJ .|. "|'' 

"|'' You|PRP could|MD write|VB a|DT play|NN about|IN someone|NN like|IN him|PRP .|. "|'' 

"|'' Perhaps|RB .|. "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP think|VBP his|PRP$ face|NN is|VBZ his|PRP$ form|NN of|IN vanity|NN .|. 
It|PRP 's|VBZ the|DT reverse|NN of|IN you|PRP with|IN those|DT ridiculous|JJ stomach|NN muscles|NNS .|. 
Old|JJ men|NNS should|MD be|VB fat|JJ .|. "|'' 

"|'' Is|VBZ Emil|NNP ?|. "|'' 

"|'' Yes|UH .|. "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP am|VBP jealous|JJ .|. 
I|PRP 'll|MD eat|VB two|CD dinners|NNS tonight|NN .|. 
Five|CD deserts|NNS .|. "|'' 

She|PRP giggled|JJ .|. 
And|CC then|RB we|PRP did|VBD make|VB love|NN .|. 

I|PRP 've|VBP been|VBN thinking|VBG about|IN the|DT mindwipe|NN ,|, now|RB two|CD days|NNS away|RB .|. 
Who|WP said|VBD that|IN those|DT who|WP forget|VBP the|DT past|JJ are|VBP doomed|VBN to|TO repeat|VB it|PRP ?|. 
I|PRP fear|VBP that|WDT may|MD be|VB true|JJ for|IN me|PRP .|. 
Add|VB this|DT to|TO the|DT reasons|NNS I|PRP write|VBP now|RB :|: to|TO remember|VB something|NN ,|, perhaps|RB even|RB to|TO learn|VB -|- -|- 

Emil|NNP Malaquez|NNP arrived|VBD after|IN sundown|NN ,|, carrying|VBG a|DT small|JJ package|NN wrapped|VBD in|IN what|WP looked|VBD like|IN real|JJ paper|NN .|. 
His|PRP$ evening|NN dress|NN was|VBD formal|JJ ,|, expensive|JJ ,|, and|CC slightly|RB stained|JJ ,|, as|IN that|DT of|IN all|DT forgetful|JJ artists|NNS should|MD be|VB .|. 
He|PRP was|VBD a|DT jovial|JJ man|NN with|IN an|DT easy|JJ laugh|NN ,|, and|CC even|RB uglier|NN than|IN Tasha|NNP had|VBD suggested|VBN .|. 
I|PRP liked|VBD him|PRP immediately|RB .|. 

"|'' Señor|NNP Malaquez|NNP ?|. "|'' 

"|'' Please|VB .|. 
Call|VB me|PRP Emil|NNP .|. 
You|PRP must|MD be|VB Bernardo|NNP .|. 
Tasha|NNP 's|POS told|VBD me|PRP much|RB about|IN you|PRP .|. "|'' 

"|'' All|DT of|IN it|PRP outrageous|JJ praise|NN ?|. "|'' 

"|'' All|DT of|IN it|PRP .|. "|'' 

"|'' Ah|UH ,|, she|PRP is|VBZ wonderfully|RB perceptive|JJ .|. "|'' 

He|PRP raised|VBD an|DT eyebrow|NN ,|, then|RB guffawed|JJ .|. 
"|'' Has|VBZ she|PRP said|VBD as|IN much|RB about|IN me|PRP ?|. "|'' 

"|'' She|PRP thinks|VBZ you|PRP are|VBP a|DT genius|NN .|. 
Do|VBP come|VBN in|IN .|. "|'' 

"|'' Thank|VB you|PRP .|. "|'' 
Stepping|NNP into|IN the|DT living|VBG room|NN ,|, he|PRP said|VBD ,|, "|'' A|DT beautiful|JJ house|NN .|. "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP 'm|VBP glad|JJ you|PRP came|VBD after|IN dark|NN .|. "|'' 

Tasha|NNP ,|, by|IN accident|NN or|CC design|NN ,|, had|VBD found|VBN an|DT innocently|RB erotic|JJ posture|NN on|IN the|DT couch|NN ,|, where|WRB she|PRP lay|VBP with|IN a|DT book|NN of|IN M|NNP '|POS duvian|NN prints|NNS .|. 
"|'' Emil|NNP !|. "|'' 
She|PRP leapt|VBD up|RB .|. 
"|'' I|PRP did|VBD not|RB expect|VB you|PRP -|- -|- "|'' 

"|'' So|RB early|JJ ?|. "|'' 

"|'' -|- -|- on|IN time|NN .|. 
It|PRP 's|VBZ unforgiveable|JJ ,|, but|CC you|PRP 're|VBP forgiven|VBN .|. "|'' 
She|PRP nodded|JJ at|IN the|DT package|NN .|. 
"|'' What|WP 's|VBZ that|DT ?|. "|'' 

"|'' For|IN your|PRP$ kindness|NN in|IN inviting|VBG a|DT stranger|NN into|IN your|PRP$ home|NN .|. "|'' 
He|PRP held|VBD it|PRP out|IN ,|, and|CC with|IN a|DT delighted|JJ "|'' Oh|UH !|. "|'' 
Tasha|NNP snatched|VBD it|PRP from|IN him|PRP to|TO rip|NN away|RB the|DT paper|NN .|. 

I|PRP stopped|VBD writing|VBG ,|, and|CC only|RB the|DT thought|NN that|IN I|PRP might|MD miss|VB the|DT mindwipe|NN kept|VBD me|PRP from|IN another|DT spree|NN .|. 
I|PRP went|VBD walking|VBG ,|, but|CC after|IN N|NNP '|POS apulco|NN ,|, Rio|NNP seems|VBZ no|DT fit|JJ abode|NN for|IN a|DT creature|NN of|IN flesh|NN .|. 
I|PRP walked|VBD from|IN this|DT hotel|NN to|TO the|DT old|JJ city|NN ,|, past|JJ the|DT end|NN of|IN the|DT slidewalks|NNS and|CC softwalks|NNS to|TO the|DT hard|JJ ,|, cracked|VBN pavement|NN of|IN City|NNP Park|NNP .|. 
But|CC Undersiders|NNP left|VBD me|PRP alone|RB .|. 
Perhaps|RB they|PRP recognized|VBD a|DT fellow|NN ghost|NN .|. 
So|IN I|PRP returned|VBD ,|, and|CC slept|VBD ,|, and|CC now|RB the|DT mindwipe|NN is|VBZ thirteen|NN hours|NNS away|RB .|. 

The|DT side|NN of|IN Malaquez|NNP 's|POS parcel|NN gave|VBD way|NN to|TO reveal|VB a|DT greenmunk|NN caught|VBN in|IN a|DT sheen|NN of|IN solid|JJ air|NN .|. 
Bits|NNP of|IN leaf|NN mold|NN flew|VBD from|IN under|IN his|PRP$ feet|NNS as|IN he|PRP ran|VBD to|TO greet|VB a|DT friend|NN or|CC a|DT bringer|NN of|IN food|NN .|. 
Tasha|NNP oohed|JJ in|IN awe|NN .|. 
I|PRP said|VBD ,|, "|'' Frodo|NNP 's|POS been|VBN visiting|VBG you|PRP ,|, eh|NN ?|. "|'' 

Malaquez|NNP said|VBD ,|, "|'' Your|PRP$ pet|NN ?|. "|'' 

"|'' Hardly|RB .|. 
He|PRP lives|VBZ around|IN here|RB somewhere|RB .|. 
I|PRP suppose|VBP he|PRP was|VBD attracted|VBN to|TO the|DT commotion|NN up|RP the|DT hill|NN .|. "|'' 

"|'' Ah|UH ,|, "|'' Malaquez|NNP said|VBD .|. 
"|'' Why|WRB '|POS Frodo|NNP '|'' ?|. "|'' 

Tasha|NNP said|VBD ,|, "|'' A|DT little|JJ fellow|NN with|IN big|JJ ,|, furry|NN feet|NNS .|. 
What|WP else|RB could|MD he|PRP be|VB called|VBN ?|. "|'' 
She|PRP handed|VBD the|DT sculpture|NN to|TO me|PRP .|. 

I|PRP almost|RB dropped|VBD it|PRP ;|: I|PRP expected|VBD it|PRP to|TO weigh|VB no|DT more|JJR than|IN a|DT holo|NN .|. 
"|'' Heavy|NNP ,|, "|'' I|PRP said|VBD ,|, as|IN if|IN he|PRP might|MD not|RB have|VB known|VBN .|. 

He|PRP laughed|VBD .|. 
"|'' My|PRP$ last|JJ piece|NN was|VBD of|IN four|CD old|JJ Undersiders|NNP crouched|VBD around|IN a|DT trash|NN fire|NN .|. 
Be|VB glad|JJ someone|NN did|VBD n't|RB toss|VB that|IN to|TO you|PRP .|. "|'' 
He|PRP spoke|VBD of|IN his|PRP$ art|NN with|IN the|DT enthusiasm|NN of|IN a|DT seven|CD -|- year|NN -|- old|JJ .|. 
"|'' Um|NNP ,|, I|PRP should|MD wait|VB to|TO importune|NN you|PRP ,|, but|CC ...|... "|'' 
He|PRP grinned|JJ shyly|RB .|. 
"|'' A|DT confession|NN ,|, and|CC then|RB a|DT request|NN .|. 
And|CC then|RB you|PRP must|MD forgive|VB me|PRP for|IN being|VBG so|RB forward|RB .|. 
It|PRP 's|VBZ not|RB easy|JJ for|IN me|PRP to|TO ask|VB a|DT favor|NN .|. "|'' 

"|'' Relax|NNP ,|, "|'' I|PRP said|VBD .|. 
"|'' It|PRP 's|VBZ easy|JJ for|IN me|PRP to|TO turn|VB one|CD down|RB .|. "|'' 

He|PRP glanced|VBD at|IN me|PRP and|CC decided|VBD I|PRP was|VBD joking|VBG .|. 
The|DT surprising|JJ thing|NN is|VBZ that|IN I|PRP was|VBD .|. 
"|'' Good|JJ .|. 
My|PRP$ last|JJ show|NN -|- -|- "|'' 

"|'' -|- -|- was|VBD glorious|JJ !|. "|'' 
Tasha|NNP said|VBD .|. 

"|'' -|- -|- was|VBD kindly|RB received|VBN ,|, "|'' he|PRP said|VBD .|. 
"|'' But|CC an|DT artist|NN who|WP would|MD stay|VB first|JJ among|IN his|PRP$ fellows|NNS can|MD tell|VB when|WRB he|PRP begins|VBZ to|TO fail|VB .|. "|'' 

"|'' Oh|UH ?|. "|'' 
I|PRP hoped|VBD no|DT one|PRP would|MD bring|VB up|RP my|PRP$ last|JJ three|CD plays|NNS .|. 

"|'' I|PRP must|MD change|VB my|PRP$ subject|JJ matter|NN .|. 
No|DT more|JJR urchins|NNS ,|, dopers|NNS ,|, vagrants|NNS ,|, or|CC whores|NNS .|. 
I|PRP want|VBP to|TO do|VB more|RBR traditional|JJ portraits|NNS .|. "|'' 
He|PRP spoke|VBD quickly|RB ,|, prepared|VBN to|TO be|VB rejected|VBN .|. 
"|'' Would|MD you|PRP permit|VB me|PRP to|TO do|VB one|CD of|IN you|PRP ?|. 
I|PRP would|MD pay|VB -|- -|- "|'' 

"|'' Never|RB ,|, "|'' I|PRP said|VBD .|. 

"|'' Ah|UH .|. "|'' 
He|PRP shrugged|VBD lightly|RB .|. 

"|'' Nardo|NNP !|. "|'' 
Tasha|NNP said|VBD .|. 
"|'' It|PRP 's|VBZ an|DT honor|NN -|- -|- "|'' 

"|'' Of|IN course|NN ,|, "|'' I|PRP said|VBD .|. 
"|'' That|DT 's|VBZ why|WRB I|PRP cannot|NN take|NN payment|NN .|. "|'' 

"|'' Oh|UH ?|. 
Oh|UH !|. 
Thank|VB you|PRP !|. "|'' 
Malaquez|NNP turned|VBD to|TO Tasha|NNP .|. 
"|'' And|CC you|PRP as|RB well|RB ?|. 
Perhaps|RB the|DT two|CD of|IN you|PRP together|RB ?|. "|'' 

Her|PRP$ eyes|NNS became|VBD circles|NNS at|IN the|DT idea|NN of|IN being|VBG ,|, as|IN she|PRP undoubtedly|RB thought|VBD it|PRP ,|, immortalized|JJ by|IN Emil|NNP Malaquez|NNP .|. 
Catching|VBG herself|PRP ,|, she|PRP said|VBD casually|RB ,|, "|'' Oh|UH ...|... "|'' And|CC then|RB she|PRP smiled|VBD ,|, laughed|VBD loudly|RB at|IN herself|PRP in|IN the|DT way|NN that|IN always|RB made|VBN me|PRP think|VBP how|WRB much|JJ I|PRP loved|VBD her|PRP$ ,|, and|CC said|VBD ,|, "|'' My|PRP$ God|NNP ,|, yes|UH ,|, yes|UH ,|, yes|UH !|. "|'' 
For|IN a|DT perfect|JJ moment|NN ,|, Emil|NNP and|CC Tasha|NNP and|CC I|PRP were|VBD one|CD entity|NN ,|, laughing|VBG until|IN our|PRP$ lungs|NNS hurt|VBN .|. 

This|DT is|VBZ torture|VBP .|. 
I|PRP had|VBD not|RB considered|VBN that|IN I|PRP might|MD not|RB write|VB to|TO learn|VB ,|, but|CC to|TO punish|VB myself|PRP .|. 
Let|VB me|PRP abuse|NN the|DT playwright|NN and|CC dismiss|VB the|DT penultimate|NN scene|NN in|IN a|DT few|JJ sentences|NNS :|: After|IN giving|VBG Emil|NNP full|JJ rights|NNS to|TO a|DT sculpture|NN of|IN Tasha|NNP and|CC me|PRP ,|, we|PRP had|VBD a|DT good|JJ dinner|NN of|IN curried|JJ clam|NN chowder|NN ,|, lobsters|NNS boiled|VBD on|IN Terra|NNP and|CC unstopped|JJ still|RB steaming|VBG on|IN N|NNP '|POS Apulco|NNP ,|, and|CC cinnamon|NN custard|NN for|IN desert|NN .|. 
Then|RB we|PRP went|VBD out|IN for|IN a|DT late|JJ swim|VBP .|. 

I|PRP had|VBD drunk|JJ too|RB much|JJ ,|, I|PRP confess|NNS ,|, though|IN we|PRP all|DT had|VBD .|. 
Somehow|RB ,|, Tasha|NNP and|CC I|PRP began|VBD to|TO argue|VB the|DT worth|NN of|IN Solevgrad|NNP jazz|NN ,|, as|IN inconsequential|NN a|DT topic|NN as|IN I|PRP can|MD imagine|VB .|. 
She|PRP had|VBD studied|VBN it|PRP in|IN school|NN ,|, so|IN she|PRP thought|VBD herself|PRP as|IN an|DT expert|NN .|. 
I|PRP once|RB had|VBD a|DT neighbor|NN who|WP played|VBD it|PRP constantly|RB ,|, loudly|RB ,|, and|CC badly|RB ,|, so|IN I|PRP thought|VBD I|PRP knew|VBD it|PRP better|JJR .|. 
Malaquez|NNP tried|VBD to|TO mediate|VB ,|, but|CC I|PRP saw|VBD him|PRP as|IN siding|NN with|IN Tasha|NNP .|. 
So|RB ,|, I|PRP think|VBP ,|, did|VBD she|PRP .|. 
The|DT subject|JJ shifted|VBN from|IN music|NN to|TO Tasha|NNP 's|POS obsession|NN with|IN fame|NN ,|, undoubtedly|RB by|IN a|DT leap|NN that|IN I|PRP made|VBD .|. 
She|PRP had|VBD no|DT choice|NN but|CC to|TO follow|VB .|. 
(|( I|NN do|VBP not|RB remember|VB any|DT of|IN this|DT well|RB ,|, just|RB now|RB ,|, nor|CC do|VBP I|PRP care|VBP to|TO .|. 
Those|DT who|WP are|VBP truly|RB curious|JJ may|MD look|VB at|IN the|DT last|JJ act|NN of|IN "|'' Captured|NNP Moments|NNP .|. "|'' 
)|) I|PRP remember|VBP suggesting|VBG ,|, with|IN characteristic|JJ tact|NN ,|, that|IN she|PRP add|VBP Emil|NNP to|TO her|PRP$ small|JJ list|NN of|IN major|JJ accomplishments|NNS .|. 

Malaquez|NNP glanced|VBD away|RB ,|, embarrassed|JJ .|. 
Tasha|NNP looked|VBD at|IN me|PRP as|IN if|IN to|TO say|VB ,|, "|'' I|PRP will|MD .|. "|'' 
She|PRP said|VBD ,|, "|'' I|PRP feel|VBP sorry|JJ for|IN you|PRP ,|, Nardo|NNP .|. 
I|PRP 'll|MD see|VB Emil|NNP home|NN .|. "|'' 

"|'' Yes|UH ,|, "|'' I|PRP said|VBD ,|, "|'' Do|VBP that|IN ,|, "|'' and|CC did|VBD not|RB care|VB what|WP she|PRP did|VBD ,|, or|CC why|WRB .|. 

Emil|NNP asked|VBD ,|, "|'' You|PRP 're|VBP all|DT right|NN ?|. "|'' 
I|PRP muttered|JJ something|NN he|PRP must|MD have|VB interpreted|VBN as|IN assent|NN .|. 
They|PRP both|DT walked|VBD up|IN to|TO Emil|NNP 's|POS home|NN while|IN I|PRP watched|VBD the|DT scarlet|JJ moonlight|NN ripple|NN on|IN distant|JJ waves|NNS .|. 
Disgusted|VBN with|IN Tasha|NNP but|CC more|RBR disgusted|VBN with|IN myself|PRP ,|, I|PRP finally|RB realized|VBD she|PRP would|MD not|RB return|VB that|DT night|NN and|CC went|VBD into|IN The|DT Sleeping|VBG Flamingo|NNP to|TO drink|VB myself|PRP to|TO sleep|VB .|. 

She|PRP had|VBD not|RB come|VB home|NN when|WRB I|PRP woke|VBD in|IN mid-morning|NN .|. 
I|PRP waited|VBD ,|, and|CC drank|NN a|DT glass|NN of|IN MorningAfter|NNP and|CC three|CD cups|NNS of|IN coffee|NN ,|, and|CC wondered|VBD whether|IN our|PRP$ affair|NN could|MD survive|VB the|DT events|NNS of|IN the|DT night|NN ,|, and|CC whether|IN I|PRP wanted|VBD it|PRP to|TO .|. 
Perhaps|RB I|PRP should|MD have|VB invited|VBN Emil|NNP to|TO stay|VB ,|, but|CC even|RB then|RB I|PRP knew|VBD that|DT sex|NN was|VBD not|RB the|DT problem|NN between|IN Tasha|NNP and|CC me|PRP .|. 
The|DT problem|NN was|VBD that|IN I|PRP have|VBP trouble|NN distinguishing|VBG between|IN compromise|NN and|CC capitulation|NN ,|, between|IN symbols|NNS and|CC substance|NN .|. 
Shortly|RB before|IN noon|NN ,|, I|PRP climbed|VBD the|DT sandy|JJ path|NN to|TO Dream|VB 's|POS End|NN ,|, rehearsing|VBG my|PRP$ apology|NN ,|, slowing|VBG only|RB to|TO pluck|VB burrs|NNS from|IN between|IN my|PRP$ sandals|NNS and|CC my|PRP$ feet|NNS .|. 

Malaquez|NNP answered|VBD the|DT door|NN in|IN blood|NN -|- red|JJ pajamas|NNS and|CC a|DT black|JJ silk|NN robe|NN .|. 
Sixty|CD years|NNS ago|RB in|IN a|DT similar|JJ situation|NN ,|, I|PRP had|VBD broken|VBN my|PRP$ knuckles|NNS on|IN someone|NN 's|POS face|NN .|. 
I|PRP merely|RB said|VBD ,|, "|'' Is|VBZ Tasha|NNP here|RB ?|. "|'' 

He|PRP pursed|JJ his|PRP$ lips|NNS slightly|RB ,|, then|RB nodded|JJ .|. 
"|'' Yes|UH .|. "|'' 

"|'' May|NNP I|PRP see|VBP her|PRP ?|. "|'' 
When|WRB he|PRP hesitated|JJ ,|, I|PRP said|VBD ,|, "|'' Last|JJ night|NN was|VBD my|PRP$ fault|NN .|. 
I|PRP hold|VBP it|PRP against|IN neither|DT of|IN you|PRP .|. 
Please|VB .|. 
Let|VB me|PRP talk|VBP to|TO her|PRP .|. "|'' 

"|'' I|PRP -|- -|- "|'' 

"|'' Please|VB .|. "|'' 

He|PRP looked|VBD me|PRP and|CC at|IN last|RB said|VBD ,|, "|'' Very|RB well|RB .|. "|'' 

We|PRP walked|VBD through|IN his|PRP$ house|NN in|IN silence|NN .|. 
It|PRP was|VBD as|IN attractive|JJ and|CC as|RB impersonal|NN as|IN a|DT decorator|NN could|MD arrange|VB for|IN tenants|NNS of|IN unknown|JJ taste|NN .|. 
A|DT tall|JJ ,|, narrow|JJ stopbox|NN stood|VBD in|IN the|DT center|NN of|IN one|CD room|NN ;|: sand|NN trickled|JJ forever|RB downward|JJ while|IN beads|NNS of|IN water|NN splashed|VBD across|IN the|DT sand|NN 's|POS path|NN .|. 
If|IN that|DT was|VBD Malaquez|NNP 's|POS work|NN ,|, it|PRP was|VBD a|DT very|RB minor|JJ effort|NN .|. 
But|CC then|RB ,|, I|PRP was|VBD in|IN no|DT mood|NN to|TO consider|VB art|NN .|. 
I|PRP only|RB wanted|VBD to|TO despise|VB the|DT man|NN who|WP had|VBD slept|VBD with|IN my|PRP$ lover|NN .|. 
That|DT was|VBD easier|JJR than|IN despising|VBG myself|PRP .|. 

He|PRP paused|VBD before|IN a|DT bedroom|NN door|NN .|. 
"|'' I|PRP should|MD go|VB in|IN first|NN .|. 
To|TO prepare|VB her|PRP .|. "|'' 

I|PRP smiled|VBD .|. 
"|'' She|PRP handles|VBZ surprise|NN surprisingly|RB well|RB .|. "|'' 

"|'' What|WP would|MD it|PRP hurt|VBD ?|. "|'' 

"|'' True|JJ .|. 
Go|VB ahead|RB .|. 
Tell|VB her|PRP ...|... "|'' 
I|PRP shrugged|VBD .|. 
"|'' Tell|VB her|PRP$ I|PRP love|VBP her|PRP .|. "|'' 

He|PRP studied|VBD me|PRP ,|, then|RB said|VBD ,|, "|'' I|PRP 'm|VBP sorry|JJ things|NNS happened|VBD this|DT way|NN ,|, Bernardo|NNP .|. 
I|PRP did|VBD n't|RB anticipate|VB last|JJ night|NN -|- -|- "|'' |- 

"|'' I|PRP 'm|VBP very|RB good|JJ at|IN making|VBG things|NNS happen|VBP this|DT way|NN .|. 
But|CC if|IN Tasha|NNP will|MD forgive|VB me|PRP -|- -|- "|'' 

He|PRP nodded|JJ ,|, repeated|VBN ,|, "|'' I|PRP am|VBP sorry|JJ ,|, "|'' then|RB slipped|VBD into|IN the|DT next|JJ room|NN .|. 
I|PRP waited|VBD in|IN the|DT dark|NN ,|, carpeted|VBD hall|NN .|. 
A|DT warm|JJ breeze|NN came|VBD from|IN silent|JJ vents|NNS above|IN me|PRP .|. 
I|PRP heard|VBD no|DT voices|NNS until|IN Malaquez|NNP said|VBD ,|, "|'' Enter|VB .|. "|'' 

I|PRP blinked|VBD when|WRB I|PRP opened|VBD the|DT door|NN .|. 
Sunlight|NNP filled|VBD Malaquez|NNP 's|POS bedroom|NN .|. 
Tasha|NNP lay|VBD sprawled|JJ nude|JJ on|IN a|DT rumpled|JJ bed|NN .|. 
Her|PRP$ skin|NN seemed|VBD as|IN smooth|JJ and|CC as|RB polished|JJ as|IN the|DT bed|NN 's|POS teak|NN frame|NN .|. 
She|PRP was|VBD looking|VBG slightly|RB to|TO my|PRP$ left|JJ ,|, smiling|VBG with|IN trust|NN and|CC satisfaction|NN like|IN one|CD sexually|RB content|NN .|. 
Malaquez|NNP stood|VBD near|IN her|PRP$ ,|, pointing|VBG something|NN at|IN my|PRP$ chest|NN .|. 
Though|IN the|DT morning|NN sun|NN shone|NN fully|RB on|IN both|DT of|IN them|PRP ,|, it|PRP shimmered|VBD around|IN Tasha|NNP .|. 

The|DT part|NN of|IN my|PRP$ mind|NN that|WDT remembered|VBD four|CD months|NNS in|IN NorAm|NNP during|IN the|DT Great|NNP Cleaning|VBG sent|VBN me|PRP rolling|VBG across|IN the|DT floor|NN .|. 
Malaquez|NNP was|VBD not|RB prepared|VBN for|IN me|PRP to|TO react|VB so|RB quickly|RB ,|, or|CC perhaps|RB he|PRP waited|VBD too|RB long|RB for|IN an|DT expression|NN I|PRP would|MD not|RB have|VB ,|, a|DT gesture|NN I|PRP would|MD not|RB make|VB ,|, a|DT poignant|JJ moment|NN of|IN repentence|NN ,|, wonder|VB ,|, despair|NN ,|, or|CC love|NN .|. 
Had|VBD he|PRP been|VBN faster|RBR ,|, he|PRP could|MD have|VB had|VBN rage|NN .|. 
I|PRP threw|VBD a|DT chair|NN at|IN him|PRP .|. 
As|IN he|PRP fell|VBD ,|, I|PRP scrambled|VBD onto|IN him|PRP ,|, my|PRP$ knees|NNS pinning|VBG his|PRP$ arms|NNS ,|, my|PRP$ fingers|NNS probing|VBG his|PRP$ neck|NN .|. 

I|PRP shouted|VBD ,|, "|'' Where|WRB is|VBZ she|PRP ?|. 
Tell|VB me|PRP ,|, or|CC I|PRP 'll|MD kill|VB -|- -|- "|'' 

He|PRP began|VBD to|TO cry|VB .|. 
"|'' She|PRP left|VBD .|. 
Earlier|RBR this|DT morning|NN -|- -|- "|'' 

Her|PRP$ clothes|NNS lay|VBP by|IN the|DT cube|NN enclosing|VBG the|DT bed|NN .|. 
I|PRP hit|VBD him|PRP with|IN the|DT back|NN of|IN my|PRP$ hand|NN .|. 
"|'' Tell|VB me|PRP ,|, Malaquez|NNP .|. "|'' 

"|'' She|PRP wanted|VBD to|TO be|VB famous|JJ .|. 
She|PRP did|VBD !|. 
Now|RB she|PRP will|MD be|VB .|. "|'' 

He|PRP seemed|VBD to|TO expect|VB me|PRP to|TO understand|VB .|. 
"|'' Where|WRB !|. "|'' 
I|PRP demanded|VBD ,|, squeezing|VBG his|PRP$ throat|NN until|IN he|PRP began|VBD jerking|VBG his|PRP$ head|NN madly|RB at|IN the|DT sculpture|NN .|. 

I|PRP stared|VBD at|IN the|DT naked|JJ Tasha|NNP .|. 
Most|JJS of|IN his|PRP$ story|NN I|PRP have|VBP pieced|VBN together|RB since|RB ,|, but|CC I|PRP understood|VBD enough|RB as|IN I|PRP knelt|NN on|IN his|PRP$ chest|NN with|IN my|PRP$ hands|NNS tight|JJ on|IN his|PRP$ fleshy|NN throat|NN .|. 
He|PRP had|VBD made|VBN his|PRP$ name|NN with|IN a|DT home|NN capturador|NN .|. 
He|PRP began|VBD with|IN small|JJ animals|NNS and|CC moved|VBD on|IN to|TO derelicts|NNS and|CC Undersiders|NNP ,|, people|NNS who|WP would|MD never|RB be|VB missed|VBN .|. 
Now|RB he|PRP had|VBD thought|VBN to|TO use|VB vacationers|NNS like|IN Tasha|NNP and|CC me|PRP ,|, and|CC when|WRB someone|NN came|VBD looking|VBG ,|, he|PRP would|MD say|VB we|PRP had|VBD gone|VBN island|NN -|- hopping|NN in|IN our|PRP$ windboat|NN .|. 
Our|PRP$ boat|NN would|MD disappear|VB into|IN the|DT ocean|NN to|TO be|VB found|VBN or|CC not|RB as|IN the|DT wind|NN and|CC tides|NNS chose|VBD .|. 
His|PRP$ story|NN would|MD stand|VB in|IN either|DT case|NN .|. 

I|PRP wanted|VBD him|PRP to|TO tell|VB me|PRP more|JJR ,|, but|CC he|PRP babbled|JJ ,|, begging|VBG me|PRP to|TO forgive|VB him|PRP ,|, to|TO understand|VB .|. 
I|PRP did|VBD not|RB listen|VB .|. 
I|PRP took|VBD the|DT capturador|NN ,|, a|DT matte|NN black|JJ Tiempo|NNP Capturado|NNP ,|, from|IN his|PRP$ grip|NN and|CC studied|VBD it|PRP ,|, not|RB really|RB thinking|VBG about|IN it|PRP or|CC Malaquez|NNP or|CC Tasha|NNP .|. 
I|PRP think|VBP I|PRP was|VBD wondering|VBG what|WP it|PRP meant|VBD to|TO say|VB that|IN a|DT thing|NN was|VBD art|NN ,|, so|IN we|PRP accepted|VBD it|PRP as|IN art|NN .|. 
Or|CC perhaps|RB I|PRP was|VBD thinking|VBG about|IN the|DT things|NNS that|WDT humanity|NN made|VBN that|WDT would|MD outlive|JJ our|PRP$ species|NNS .|. 
But|CC I|PRP was|VBD probably|RB only|RB looking|VBG at|IN my|PRP$ reflection|NN in|IN the|DT capturador|NN 's|POS lens|NN .|. 
Had|VBD he|PRP said|VBD then|RB that|IN I|PRP should|MD use|VB it|PRP on|IN myself|PRP ,|, I|PRP might|MD have|VB .|. 

That|DT moment|NN passed|VBN .|. 
I|PRP looked|VBD at|IN Malaquez|NNP .|. 
His|PRP$ eyes|NNS opened|VBD wider|JJR while|IN we|PRP watched|VBD each|DT other|JJ .|. 
His|PRP$ lips|NNS contorted|JJ as|IN if|IN they|PRP had|VBD lost|VBN their|PRP$ ability|NN to|TO shape|VB sound|NN .|. 
I|PRP turned|VBD to|TO touch|VB the|DT cube|NN that|WDT was|VBD Tasha|NNP 's|POS crypt|NN .|. 
She|PRP smiled|VBD in|IN trust|NN or|CC pleasure|NN or|CC pride|NN ,|, an|DT erotic|JJ Mona|NNP Lisa|NNP who|WP would|MD smile|NN forever|RB ,|, and|CC I|PRP could|MD never|RB know|VB why|WRB .|. 

The|DT controls|NNS of|IN the|DT capturador|NN were|VBD more|RBR complex|JJ than|IN those|DT of|IN a|DT kitchen|NN model|NN ,|, but|CC I|PRP recognized|VBD the|DT unstop|NN tab|NN .|. 
I|PRP could|MD free|VB Tasha|NNP .|. 
If|IN I|PRP did|VBD ,|, one|CD of|IN three|CD things|NNS would|MD happen|VB .|. 
Most|JJS likely|JJ :|: she|PRP would|MD be|VB meat|NN -|- -|- there|EX is|VBZ a|DT reason|NN why|WRB stopboxes|NNS are|VBP most|RBS often|RB used|VBN in|IN kitchens|NNS .|. 
Less|RBR likely|JJ :|: she|PRP would|MD live|VB the|DT rest|NN of|IN her|PRP$ days|NNS with|IN a|DT mind|NN as|IN free|JJ of|IN worry|VBP as|IN a|DT slug|NN 's|POS .|. 
And|CC the|DT tiniest|JJS chance|NN of|IN all|DT :|: she|PRP would|MD blink|VB as|IN if|IN I|PRP had|VBD just|RB materialized|VBN in|IN Emil|NNP 's|POS bedroom|NN ,|, and|CC then|RB she|PRP would|MD laugh|VB and|CC tell|VB me|PRP that|IN she|PRP was|VBD going|VBG to|TO be|VB immortal|NN .|. 

As|IN I|PRP put|VBP my|PRP$ hand|NN on|IN the|DT impervious|JJ surface|NN of|IN Tasha|NNP 's|POS stopbox|NN ,|, I|PRP heard|VBD Malaquez|NNP run|VBD for|IN the|DT door|NN .|. 

It|PRP is|VBZ strange|JJ to|TO know|VB that|IN we|PRP can|MD do|VB acts|NNS of|IN unrepayable|JJ kindness|NN to|TO those|DT we|PRP should|MD hate|VB .|. 
Know|VBP this|DT ,|, my|PRP$ future|JJ self|NN :|: Thanks|NNS to|TO us|PRP ,|, Emil|NNP Malaquez|NNP 's|POS name|NN will|MD live|VB as|RB long|RB as|IN his|PRP$ masterpiece|NN ,|, "|'' A|DT Self|NNP -|- Portrait|NNP |- |- :|: Anguish|NNP ,|, "|'' endures|NNS .|. 

And|CC Tasha|NNP ?|. 
I|PRP could|MD say|VB that|IN I|PRP did|VBD not|RB dare|VB to|TO take|VB responsibility|NN for|IN her|PRP$ fate|NN .|. 
I|PRP could|MD say|VB that|IN I|PRP chose|VBD out|IN of|IN consideration|NN for|IN her|PRP$ desire|NN for|IN fame|NN ;|: some|DT critics|NNS already|RB say|VBP "|'' Waking|NNP With|IN Tasha|NNP "|'' is|VBZ Malaquez|NNP 's|POS finest|JJS work|NN .|. 
If|IN science|NN finds|VBZ a|DT way|NN to|TO safely|RB free|VB the|DT subjects|NNS of|IN Emil|NNP 's|POS art|NN ,|, perhaps|RB the|DT I|PRP who|WP reads|VBZ this|DT file|NN will|MD know|VB that|IN my|PRP$ decision|NN is|VBZ wise|JJ .|. 
But|CC I|PRP cannot|NN stop|NN thinking|VBG that|IN I|PRP was|VBD never|RB afraid|JJ of|IN losing|VBG Tasha|NNP to|TO brain|NN damage|NN or|CC death|NN .|. 
My|PRP$ fear|NN is|VBZ that|IN she|PRP would|MD live|VB ,|, and|CC I|PRP would|MD learn|VB that|IN I|PRP had|VBD lost|VBN her|PRP$ long|JJ before|IN Emil|NNP Malaquez|NNP translated|VBN her|PRP into|IN a|DT thing|NN that|WDT can|MD be|VB kept|VBN ,|, admired|VBN ,|, and|CC loved|VBD .|. 

For|IN in|IN my|PRP$ way|NN ,|, I|PRP have|VBP done|VBN the|DT same|JJ thing|NN .|. 

I|PRP am|VBP ready|JJ for|IN the|DT mindwipe|NN now|RB .|. 

